It is coming up on the one-year anniversary of my open-heart surgery in August and it has me thinking about all the feelings and thoughts I had last year. I found myself looking for a poem I had written during the Fall of 2004 as a freshman in college. This younger Kendra had no idea where her future was headed and what it would look like. Have a glimpse into the mind of Kendra from 2004. This is one of the many poems that are sprinkled throughout my first book, Live Laugh Lemonade: A Journey of Choosing to Beat the Odds.
Imagine talking to someone and not being able to look directly into their eyes.
Imagine people kneeling down while they are talking to you.
Kneeling down is kind of them, but it can also be an awkward and uncomfortable situation for both of us.
Imagine wondering what classmates are thinking of you as they sit in class next to you.
Imagine trying to make friends when most people your age are unsure of how to act around you.
Imagine trying to be independent in everything you do in life, in a world that is not built for you,
but rather taller people.
Imagine at times wanting to be “normal.”
Imagine some people thinking that you will never be able to live on your own.
Imagine going to college where there are no other small people who you can talk with about
life as a small person.
Imagine wondering one of life’s many questions, “Who will marry me?”
Imagine wanting to do something that takes no time for a taller person, but for you it takes ten more steps before it gets done. Those ten steps are still the same whether the task is enjoyable or not.
Imagine feeling nervous around new people or the opposite sex who really don’t know you or don’t understand that you are not always shy.
Imagine wanting to show the world that no one can say or do anything that can hurt or break you.
Imagine even with all of these struggles, worries, and feelings that you are happy with your life and have accepted that “When life hands you a lemon, you squeeze it as hard as you can, add sugar, and make the BEST lemonade possible.”
Imagine that you know that everyone has struggles, worries, and feelings of nervousness in their life, so you can’t dwell on what you can’t do or what you wish you could do. You need to take those experiences in life and use them to make the best out of what your future holds.